FOR PARENTS
What is your role in the future of youth sports?
Parents, you are your child's biggest supporters, advocates, mentors. It is your attitude towards youth sports that shapes your child's opinions. You are their first coach. Making positive changes in youth sports starts with you. Our goal with the Educate to Navigate Initiative is to make youth basketball about the athletes, the coaches, and the sport, not the money. The business of youth sports have become a $70 Billion industry. So where does all that money go? Hint: it's not to athletes (or their families.) It's going to corporations that have turned children into profit. So what can you, as a parent, do about it?
Explore some of our parent-specific materials below.
Your Daughter Is Going Pro... probably not
by Julie Hatfield-Still
Is your daughter going pro? Probably not.
To the parents who believe their young daughter is the next household name in sports: Take a deep breath and hear me out. Your belief in her talent is admirable. Your support matters. But your current mindset? It’s doing more harm than good.
It seems in the last week alone, I’ve heard more stories about parents and/or coaches who are pushing their 10, 9 and even 8 year old’s like they are going to be the next pro. So, I wanted to take a moment to address this, with heart and a dose of honesty.
If you think she’s going pro and you’re structuring her entire childhood around that belief, it’s time for a serious reality check. Because while she might have potential, your approach could be setting her up for burnout,
disappointment, and—ironically—underperformance.
Here are five direct, no-BS truths every parent and coach needs to understand if they think their daughter is destined for the 1% who make it to the pros.
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1. Your Pressure is More Likely to Break Her Than Make Her
The science is clear, although do we really need science to tell us that
overtraining and high-pressure environments contribute to early burnout,
anxiety, and even depression in young athletes. By age 13, 70% of kids quit organized sports, often because it’s no longer fun—it’s a job. A job they didn’t sign up for.
Your daughter should be playing because she loves it, not because you’re charting a path to a full-ride scholarship or a pro contract. The harder you push, the faster she burns out. It’s that simple. Let her enjoy the game before it becomes work.
View the rest of the article:
Hey Mom and Dad! Behave Yourselves!
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Most parents—indeed, all parents—want their children to succeed in youth sports. OK, let’s admit it: They would like their children to be stars. That’s normal. And they want to be involved in their star’s—err, child’s—sport activities. That, too, is normal. In fact, parental involvement is a critical element in the overall success of youngsters’ sport participation.
Youth sports should be viewed as a part of child rearing, and parents obviously should be part of that experience. But parents’ obligation to participate must include taking responsibility for behaving appropriately. Coaches, program administrators, sport officials, and the athletes themselves have a right to demand that spectators conform to acceptable standards of behavior. What are some guidelines for appropriate parent behavior prior to and during sport events?
Pre-Practice/Game Preparation
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Tell your child to have fun. Emphasize that sports and other activities in life are enjoyable in themselves—whether you win or lose. In other words, having fun does not depend on winning!
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Tell your child that success is related to commitment and effort! The goal is to do your best, rather than be the best.
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Emphasize that athletes are never “losers” if they commit themselves to doing their best and giving maximum effort.
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Let your son or daughter know that the pride you feel is not affected by their level of performance, or by winning. Again, effort is what counts!
During Practices/Games
Youth sports should be enjoyable for everyone, so remember to have fun. Moreover, in addition to some obvious don’ts (using profanity, drinking alcohol, etc.), you are encouraged to follow these rules of conduct:
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Do remain in the spectator area during the event.
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Don’t interfere with the coach. You must be willing to give up the responsibility for your child to the coach for the duration
of the practice or game.
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Do express interest, encouragement and support to your child. Be sure to cheer good effort as well as good performance. Communicate repeatedly that giving total effort is all you expect.
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Put down the cell phone and watch your child
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Don’t shout instructions or criticisms to the children.
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Do lend a hand when a coach or official asks for help.
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Don’t make abusive comments to athletes, parents, officials or coaches of either team. What if a parent violates a rule of conduct?
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You have the obligation to control your own behavior, and to remind others of their responsibilities, if necessary.
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When parents behave badly (loud, rowdy, obnoxious actions), it is primarily the duty of program administrators and sport officials to step in. But you can also help to correct the situation with a reminder that these are just kids playing a game.
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Caution! When parents misbehave, it could be emotionally charged and potentially dangerous. So, be very careful and diplomatic in how you approach unruly parents.
By Frank L. Smoll, Ph.D., and Ronald E. Smith, Ph.D.
Additional Resources
Navigating Your Child's Recruitment